Five

Dear Rafe Henry,

Today you turned five. Not that I need to tell you that, you’ve been counting down since July. And not that I need to tell anyone else that, either. You told everyone we saw today, “Hey! I’m five!” while displaying all five fingers on your right hand.

You’re convinced that now that you’ve turned five, they will finally admit you into kindergarten. First thing Monday morning. Dude, you’re going to be mighty disappointed when I pull up outside of preschool again. Now you’ll be counting down to August. And I’ll be trying not to even think of putting you on a schoolbus.

This week you learned to buckle your own seatbelt. Really I think you could have accomplished this before now, but you have a bit of a prince complex and believe that the rest of us are here to serve you. But buckling your own seatbelt is a big deal because now I’ll allow you to sit in the “way back”. And this makes you feel like big stuff. Once buckled in, Prince Rafe commands that his theme song be played. Your theme song is “Click Click Boom” by Saliva, and yes, it has a couple of swear words in it, but it rocks and it has a good message which, in a nutshell, is “dream big, quit your whining and don’t blame your parents for everything.” Remember that, especially that last part.

Your interests right now include dinosaurs, matchbox cars, Tonka trucks, everything farm related, and karate/wrestling. The first thing you do when you get home in the afternoon is change immediately into your pajamas, er, I mean “karate clothes”. Your uncle Kyle tries to teach you the right way to wrestle, and you go along with it for a bit, but inevitably it all ends in a body slam.

When you’re excited you say, “I’m so exciting!” And when you’re bored you say, “I’m so boring.” But believe me, you’re never boring, and I could type all night trying to capture all of the ways that you bring fun and joy, laughter and happiness into this family. Yes, you drive us crazy sometimes. I get mad at you for your selective listening. You still don’t like to sit still except when someone reads to you. Your sisters have been begging for a lock to keep you out of their bedroom. But I don’t think any one of us could even imagine life without you.

Happy Birthday, 5-year-old.

Love,
Yo Mama